Cocktail
The Perfect Green Smoothie
Maximum nutrition, zero suffering
Prep
10 min
Cook
0 min
Servings
4
Equipment
thermomix, blender
The green smoothie occupies a peculiar position in modern cuisine: universally acknowledged as healthy, frequently prepared with optimism, and often consumed with an expression of grim determination. The problem is not that green smoothies can't taste good—they absolutely can—but that most recipes treat palatability as an afterthought, as though virtuousness itself were sufficient flavoring.
This is a mistake. Humans evolved to enjoy sweet tastes and smooth textures, and no amount of dietary righteousness will override several million years of programming. The secret to a green smoothie you'll actually want to drink daily lies in proper ratios: enough frozen banana for sweetness and body, enough avocado for creaminess, and a high-powered blender that can pulverize kale stems into oblivion.
The ingredient list below is a template rather than a prescription. The frozen banana is non-negotiable—it provides both sweetness and that characteristic thick texture—but everything else can be adjusted according to what's in your refrigerator or the seasonal offerings at your local market. Think of it as a framework for getting vegetables past your own defense mechanisms.
Scale Recipe
1
10
20
or
"I have 500g of lamb — scale everything else"
Instructions
0/5 complete